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If you ask nearly any family law expert or practicing attorney out there, odds are you will get a lot of advice in favor of pre-nuptial agreements. It’s true – prenups have many legal and practical benefits, including simplifying the divorce process, heading off potential conflict, and building a solid foundation for your marriage.

However, many couples can’t shake the feeling that signing a prenup is, in some ways, tantamount to admitting marital failure before they’ve even begun. In the eyes of many people, nothing kills romance like a prenup. So picture this: you’ve thoroughly researched the pros and cons of a pre-nuptial agreement, and you’ve come to the conclusion that it’s a good idea. Unfortunately, your spouse-to-be doesn’t seem nearly as enthusiastic as you are. How do you convince him or her to sign a prenup without seeming pushy and suspicious?

As with many marriage issues, the first thing to do is to sit down with your spouse and have a serious conversation. Think of it this way – a prenup forces you and your future spouse to work out and confront a variety of thorny issues which will come up in your marriage sooner or later. The only difference is that, with a prenup, both you and your partner can approach the issues with open minds, without getting caught up in a heated argument. What better time to discuss a difficult issue than when you are both truly in love?

Furthermore, though prenups may have a bad connotation, nothing in the nature of a prenup states that it must be negative or confrontational – especially with regard to money. A prenuptial agreement might very well be designed to protect a less-wealthy spouse, rather than hurt them.

You may also advise your spouse to talk with a lawyer of their choice about the matter. By allowing your spouse to form his or her own opinion on the issue with the help of an independent and objective attorney, you take pushiness out of the picture and show your spouse that you respect his or her point of view.

One final concern many couples have about getting a pre-nuptial agreement is the financial cost. Because valid prenups must almost always be drafted by a legal professional, and both spouses must usually be represented by separate attorneys, the legal fees for a prenup can be quite hefty. However, ask your spouse to consider it a valuable investment. Though a prenup may seem expensive at the moment, its future benefits are definitely worth the trouble.

For more information on important family law issues, check out the resources provided by the San Diego family law attorneys of Fischer & Van Thiel, LLP, at their website http://www.divorcelawyerssandiego.com.

*Perhaps you would want to insert some agreement about installing steam cleaners in the house too…